It seems like whenever I catch up with a friend or family member, I am immediately asked "what's going on with the adoption?" I never know quite what to say, after all it is me whom set up specific deadlines for adoption process, something I tend to do because I am a task oriented person. The truth of the matter is, we are simply waiting. Not the waiting you might think though, we are not home study ready, nor do I expect a birth mother to come knocking at my door. We are simply waiting on The Lord's timing.
It seems like it would be so easy to wait on The Lord, but you see, I like to tell God when and how things are to happen...and He listens, all the while showing me His plans are always better. Always.
Why do I keep wanting to control my life? I often give God 90% of things, but struggle to give Him full reign of my life. I think it's because I'm a worrier. I worry about things five and ten years from now. I worry about almost everything from my parents, to where my kids will go to college. Forget the fact that they are still in diapers mind you.
I read a quote the other day explaining that to worry is to distrust God. If I truly believe that God has amazing plans for me, then wouldn't that be a huge relief, knowing that God has your whole life planned. Even as I type this I see how ridiculous it is to worry and how it does nothing but strip my life of joy.
Ever since God has placed adoption on my heart I have tried to give Him complete control. This is why right now I am simply waiting on His timing and His direction.
Thank you for all the prayers and support; they mean the world, especially since I am a worrier! :)
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